Dating Deal Breakersby Vicki Karigiannis
published January 29, 2010
When it comes to dating, we all have a laundry list of what our ideal man would be like. Along with the dos come major don’ts, many of which could act as potential deal breakers. We’ve got five common ones that women tend to have little or no tolerance for… and we’d love to hear about yours!
Deal breaker #1: He’s unemployed
We hope you’re not looking for a Sugar Daddy to pay the bills; we’re sure you’re making your own money. But for a man to not have a job or career to go to every day, that’s definitely a deal breaker. What does he do with his time, otherwise?
Exception: If he’s just been laid off due to restructuring or downsizing at his old place of work. It’s not his fault, and we’re sure after a pity-party, he’s back on the hunt for another job. Or if he’s just graduated from school and is looking for work in his field. It’s less having a job itself, and more the drive to attain a set goal that is the turn-on.
Deal breaker #2: He still lives with the ‘rents
Nookie is a bit hard to attain when mom and dad are one bedroom over… and the morning after is just plain weird when you’re all awkwardly sitting at the breakfast table together. Privacy is nice to have, and if he can afford to move out, he should.
Exception: There are many reasons people are staying home for longer or moving back in with their parents in their 20s. If he is still independent and doesn’t have his mother wash his socks and cook his meals, and perhaps has a legitimate reason to be there—saving up for his own home someday or tending to a sick parent—then he shouldn’t be given a hard time about it.
Deal breaker #3: He’s married
Just don’t even bother.
Exception: We’d like to say there are 100% no exceptions, but if he has separated from his wife, moved out, taken the ring off and is about to start divorce proceedings, then maybe it’s okay to pursue him. Big maybe.
Deal breaker #4: He’s the anti-family man
If you’re particularly close with your family, it may be hard to date someone who isn’t. He doesn’t have to be super tight-knit with them—we all have a few gripes about our parents and siblings, after all—but if he can’t muster even a few good things to say about them, drop him like a hot potato.
Exception: Some people have difficult relationships with their parents and, for them, it may be easier to cut all ties or just see and speak with them sporadically. Each situation varies, so hear him out first before you cut and run.
Deal breaker #5: He’s unclean and unkempt
If a man you’re seeing can’t bother to dress nicely on a date, or has bad breath or a lingering body odour, that is a definite no-no. After all, proper hygiene is important (we love a clean-smelling man!) and he should be able to make the effort to look nice for you on a date. If he doesn’t, he’s just sloppy and lazy.
Exception: Really, the only exception is if he meets you after a visit to the gym. Even then, however, we’d hope he’d take a shower, change and splash on some cologne before the meet-up.
Are the above your personal deal breakers, too? Or are there other ones that play a pivotal part in declining a second date? Please share below!
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